…There, in her overflowing garden, moving expressively as she tells me about the Old Country, how she used to jump as a small girl from a cliff into the Black sea, and swim like a fish. I am only four or five, and I listen as a child to a storybook.
Her hands are punctuating her stories… How she came to America around 1910 with her family of mostly lazy brothers. How at 10 she left their new home to set out alone by train – not yet knowing the language – hoping to find her older sister, a mail-order bride, and her farm. How when she found her, poor Rose, overworked by a decades-older husband, was worn out and sick – dying at the too-soon age of 24. In my mind, I imagine her child hands, smoothing her sister’s hair away from her tired face, wringing out cool cloths to place on her forehead, holding Rose’s hands in her own and promising to take care of her two small children.
She tells me about a day when she was 13 or 14, racing alongside a runaway horse and wagon carrying her two tiny nephews, Rose’s boys… How she managed to grab hold, pull herself up, grasp the reins and bring them to safety. My mouth is an “O” as I picture horses frightened into running, nostrils flaring as they bolt blindly — like in a tumultuous scene from some wild western — unbelievably stopped by… a young girl. My Grandma.
“You will write my stories some day,” she tells me, those hands holding me close. I try to memorize, record her words and tales in my heart, if not yet with pen and ink. But they are elusive… like snapshot photos that flash across my memory…
“Mother was an unusually compassionate child,” mom tells me about her as she braids my hair. As I listen, she is painting more images of the little girl from the Old Country. How at first, they lived among immigrants of many nationalities, unable to communicate much…and how she loved to help these people any way she could…even without words. I could see her hands back then when children ran more freely – playing with the small neighbor children to keep them occupied while their parents found work. Sewing and mending for others. A child herself, helping to clean their meager homes, putting flowers in a vase to pretty up their rough-hewn space, making dinners out of nothing for them, making home a welcoming light to these weary workers. No money exchanged. Just generosity and care that transcended language, age and background.
Later on, I imagine her own work-weary touch, slaving 14-hour days in a cannery, as a young teen. Then, her creative touch as she became active in theater and met her future husband, a singer, who had escaped alone from the Old Country to America by ship at 13.
I see again her hands kneading dough with joyful purpose in her sunny kitchen, creating our favorite melt-in-your-mouth delicacies – as she rose at the crack of dawn to have these treats ready and waiting for us every time she knew we were coming. And serving us “tea” in her cherished English demitasse cups with the pretty yellow-blue-and- rose pattern.
I see them dipping handmade doughnuts in an enormous pan of bubbling oil. Or cracking an egg into a delicious lemony chicken broth. Designing her own elaborate needlework tapestry patterns that graced the seats of the old-fashioned claw-foot chairs in her living room, or watering her favorite pink and purple violets on the dining room window ledge. Showing me how to gently pick strawberries. Or arranging detailed decorations for a friend’s wedding shower. Hands…always doing.
I see them smoothing her apron, grabbing her grandkids close even when we wriggled,
making courses of meals for holidays, waving playing cards with her old friends as they talked wildly in a language that was like a strange – almost scary – secret code I couldn’t understand. Or her fingers wiggling and beckoning me to take her hands, and dance together Greek-style around the living room, to Rosemary Clooney singing on TV. Or serving us in the breakfast alcove, uncovering her parakeet to greet the day, then fluttering with delight as that bird would clearly enunciate words she’d taught him…Good morning, Pamela sweetheart…
And lastly… I see them as she grew older… her fingers absently opening and closing to grip the back of the car seat as she listened to us in back. And…after her stroke… holding and squeezing a red rubber ball… or reaching for our hands to look into our eyes.
She wrote her memories across my mind, weaving them into my own… and, as I remember… I see God’s pen, using her hands to write her living letter in hearts… all along her life. And now, as she predicted… I have written some of her story for you…
She is clothed with strength and dignity,
and she laughs without fear of the future.
When she speaks, her words are wise,
and she gives instructions with kindness.
She carefully watches everything in her household
and suffers nothing from laziness. Her children stand and bless her.
- Proverbs 31
© Pam Depoyan
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Sharing with:
Imperfect Prose at Emily Wierenga’s place











Oh, my gosh…absolutely beautiful….
Thank you for sharing about your grandma. How prophetic her words were! You writing was so descriptive, I feel feel her and be an on-looker on her life. Thank you, Pam, for sharing her with all of us. We are blessed to have this little glimpse into her life.
Thank you so much, Diane! It’s always so hard for me to be objective when I write and really know if it was any good. I was praying for words on this one and it suddenly seemed to come together. I was hoping it would connect with others, so YOUR words especially bless me
And also because I’ve always wanted to write some of her story but don’t have enough details (or maybe it’s imagination?) to turn it into a full book…
Pam, May I encourage you with this? Write little stories about her, even if it’s just a DIY book for family and friends. Just this past weekend a total stranger found my son’s blog and left him a note. She took her father’s WWII journals that he kept and made a book for family and friends. Because my father in law was mentioned so many times in her father’s journals, she searched for Dad’s (he is deceased) family members and found my son. She emailed us a copy of her book. I cannot tell you what that did for our family. We now have a glimpse into his years in the war – something he would never talk about. It’s precious to us. If you’d like to read Andrew’s post about it: http://www.greaterthanknowledge.wordpress.com. I said all this just to encourage you to write your memories about her.
That’s an amazing story, Diane, and reading your son’s blog, seeing that photo of Carmine and his buddies, brought tears to my eyes. It makes us see… here were real people, just like us, in an extraordinary time and situation. I love that those women were able to find your son’s blog and locate your family. What an incredible thing the internet is… as you said in one of your blog posts recently…bringing people together who may not even meet. I want to comment on a few of your posts lately…and will soon.
Thanks for sharing that and for your encouragement. That’s a good idea…writing short stories. There aren’t many of my family left… my mom and her sister (daughters of my Grandma) are now gone as so many others. But writing these down is like making a photo in time… Blogging is giving me lots of ideas about anthologies too…
thanks!
What a heartfelt tribute.
This is so special: “You will write my stories some day,” she tells me, those hands holding me close.”
I’m glad you were able to take part in our writing project. Sorry about the technical glitches!
Thanks Jennifer! And thanks for helping me get them linked to your site.
Love the back story of your storytelling. Love how our storytellers live on in and through us.
Thanks, Brandee! Yes, I love that too…
Magnificent. You are already doing it…writing her stories. I’m so glad you linked this to the Community Writing Project for TheHighCalling.org.
Thanks for the encouraging words, Ann! I’m so glad you enjoyed it…
Wow, what a rich heritage of loving you have, Pam. Ever since I stumbled (but without regrets) into your blog, I’ve been wondering from which “Old Country” your ancestors came from. I was too timid to ask because I don’t want to pry or solicit information which may be too condescending. You know what, I love reading stories of pioneer America. I have a collection of Janet Daily novels which tell stories of old like Calder Range etc.
Your grandma could have been a writer herself was she in your generation….. so it is relegated to you, Pam….. the gift of beautiful words….. yet you made her life come alive….. even when you said it was written in heart-shapes or in her never idle hands and arms. I love her story so much, dear, especially with your writing. Thanks for sharing and thanks even if this came late.
Thank you again, Lolita, for all your encouraging words. My ancestors were from a European country. I just don’t like to put too many specifics on the blog.with crazy stuff of today with id theft etc. I’m so glad this story blessed you! And it’s never too late to receive a comment on any of my posts
Coming over from Emily’s place…..I love how I was lost in your words….lost in the story. Such love shining through.
Thank you, Brenna! I’m glad this touched you so! Thanks for sharing that. I thought this would be a great Valentine post to re-share today…