Some Zuzu’s petals, for your new year pocket…

Digital Camera

As I sit cocooned in my little corner of Christmas, snow lightly swirling and  window glow reflecting…

A friend calls, tells me the padded envelope I so carefully stuffed with her gift, made sure was closed tightly, arrived… empty.  As she describes it to me, I can picture her shredding through that yuck of gray matter just in case she’s not seeing it… but nada.  Zip.

“Strange, because it doesn’t even look tampered with,” she tells me.  “But it is stamped that it was inspected…”

I’d recently mailed four exact packages, stood right there in the post office and packed them under their noses, so now I’m scrambling.

I check with another friend and find out the same thing… somehow she only received a card that I’d addressed and placed within a larger package…not even with a postage stamp!…and never the actual gift.  Researching, I discover inspections are now allowed on certain types of mail.  That this was carelessness on part of workers who did not re-seal properly.

  And… I’m disgruntled.  If they’d wanted to check my word, they could have asked me to open it then and there.  Then I could have watched them seal it again, tape it up, prevent this.

Into the midst of my grump, perspective tilts just true north enough to lift the fog.  In the grand scheme… this… is… nothing.

I remember one time sitting in my fresh new kitchen.  Taking joy in the clean beauty of new white paint, gleaming subway tiles.  Loving the curve of the moldings I’d helped the carpenter design to top the bead board.  Being a bit dissatisfied with one portion that just didn’t lay right and they couldn’t seem to fix.  In the middle of that re-design, LIFE interrupted with some genuine crisis heaviness.  And left me thinking… what would all this matter if I only had a few more years to live?  And finding a refreshed longing that blew cobwebs of unimportance out like a breeze through open windows … I want to be fully alive…

weather, hail covered deck rain - HD stock footage clip     Because…it seems…

Sometimes life becomes most precious, receives the clarity of a cleansing spring rain, when it brinks with death and loss.

Friendships burst apart unexpectedly.  Loved ones die too early.  A job ends.  Fears rise.

And suddenly, all those trifling spills and burnt cookies I’ve been juggling no longer matter.

Have you ever noticed…when faced with an ending…

God likes to take our chins in His healing hands…lift our eyes to wonder stars only toddlers usually see?

Like George…

Stumbling, escaping, sliding on ice, he races back through guns popping.  Back to the bridge where he’d been about to give up.  “Help me Clarence!” he sobs.  “I don’t care what happens to me.  Just get me back to my wife and kids…”

Then, softer

“I want to live again.  Please God.  Let me live again!”

Cued upon that prayer, snowflakes tumble, caressingly. A benediction, soothing… restoring.

Still… he doesn’t yet recognize the answer blessing his head, his shoulders, his face.

“Bert – you know me?” he wonderingly fingers his friend’s jacket, like finding a refuge in a desert storm and questioning mirage.

“Your lip’s bleeding, George!” Bert exclaims.

That’s when he reaches for them…

Two things he’d only just a little while ago misread as God turned against him in “answer” to his prayers.   Now transformed into…a sign of life flowing from his lip.  Tiny evidence in his pocketful of miracles… Zuzu’s petals

Subtle… a hint.  But these petals seem in that moment to sing of LIFE renewed.

Exuberant wonder zips through him like lightning.  Washing everything that had appeared grimy and disappointing and lifeless only an hour ago and transforming ordinary into glory and treasure.

He whirls, races towards home.

So grateful…blessing everyone and everything he sees…

Even his car, back again, smashed against a tree…

The building and loan that felt like his albatross, now a gift…

The lovely film showing at the theater, and all of Bedford Falls, spun clean and bright, sparkling in the Christmas snow…free from becoming tainted as Pottersville

Even stopping to bang on Potter’s window… bless him with words of joy…

Merry Christmas!” he shouts.

“Merry Christmas, George!” the town calls back.

His rickety, drafty old home chameleons to regal as he bursts in…  “I could eat you up!” he delights in his children…  “Mary, are you real?” he rejoices in her embrace.

Before he even knows how God has taken care of all…paid off his debt… praise erupts within him to bestow this refreshed life.

Christmas reflection    Making me think how in our own lives, this year has ended with some national and world tragedies that leave many of us looking on despondent.  Maybe battling some personal fears too.  Raging out to God against the darkness.  Losing light.  Standing on an empty bridge.

Sometimes it seems inevitable to just… let the darkness shroud.

Forgetting that He has paid our debt too.

The gift that makes all else pale…

So that on this day that opens into a new year, I wonder…might we turn to Heaven with George’s prayer?

Lord, I want to live again.  Please God.  Help me live again.

I read a December 31 devotion yesterday that left me shaking my head.  “We don’t know what storms lie ahead–” it proclaimed.  Making me stop mid-sentence, close the book.

That’s an expectancy for trouble, came the whisper to my soul. I want you to look for my LIGHT.  I want to fill you with the adventurous wonder of a child, make you want to LIVE again…

And so…I’m looking in my pockets today.  Past the fears that waggle like Potter’s lies.

Might I find some of Zuzu’s petals there?  Something that seems broken…but in the hands of THE POTTER is reclaimed, reshaped, reformed…So, from my upturned hands, He alone can graft the fallen bits of life back into the Rose?  Like we see Him do in George?

What might He have placed in your pocket right now, what promise of Hope waiting to breeze in an open door and frolic down the corridors of your 2013?


Fresh-fallen snow dusting your world with pink dawn glow.

A bleeding lip… a falling blossom…  

A Zuzu’s petal Christmas ringing bells of His anointing on a new year.

Light for your eyes to find and rejoice in looking for life and counting simple blessings waiting there.

An open gate to enter the new year with a heart of praise for His Triumphant Goodness.

Because He lives and breathes and moves there… in the very midst of our thanksgiving.

The scene ahead, like these my first foray into posting digital photos :),  may be a bit fuzzy.    But He holds out His lantern ablaze and bids us come.  To “come in and know Him better.”  To LIVE again.

Digital Camera

©  Pam Depoyan

May you find a pocketful of miracles today! 

Petals soft, little promises of hope for your new year!

“Arise, shine, for your light has come,
and the glory of the Lord rises upon you.

~ Isaiah 60:1


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About Pam@Writing...Apples of Gold

I love to hear your thoughts, even chat back and forth amongst comments.Won't you join the conversation? :) ..................................................................................................................... May my stories refresh you, like a whisper from our Father's Heart !
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10 Responses to Some Zuzu’s petals, for your new year pocket…

  1. Sylvia R says:

    I like the “fuzzy” pictures. They look soft, and make me think we don’t have to see it all ahead so clearly, do we? Only know He is there, and He is Life.

    BTW, noticing the “I’m a writer…” button on the sidebar, I’m reminded to tell you, *I* just used what *you* did just got used in my story/post — or rather, what God did, because you held on in trust and let Him! I linked it to part one of “When Answers are Still On the Way.”

    • Thanks, Sylvia. I wasn’t going to put these photos in, but then i thought the same thing… a good illustration of “fuzzy” and we don’t have to always see clearly ahead… (Reminds me too how I used to love to squint at the Christmas lights and see how the colors spread…) I’ll have to go check your link up to that… 🙂

  2. Marilyn says:

    Beautiful posting. I love that movie and I agree let’s focus on the good that God is about to start and perform in 2013. With great anticipation and open eyes we look for his workings in our lives. Happy New Year.

  3. MaryLou says:

    I just finished watching “It’s A Wonderful Life” this evening. I have watched it many times but this time I did noticed some things that seemed new to me. We would probably be amazed if each of us could have a look at how the world around us would look if we hadn’t been born. God did place each of us here for a reason and a season. At church we were all asked near the end of this year to ask God for a word for next year and our pastor said he did receive anticipation not only as his word but he said it was for all of us. As I heard each person call out their words I listened and wondered what my word was… as someone called out joy I really felt that was my word for this year. Linking it with my pastor’s word of anticipation it became joyous anticipation. That is my prayer for the New Year that I would enter this New Year each moment with joyous anticipation of what God wants to do in my life this year. May each one of us have a joyous anticipation as we look ahead to our New Year 2013. Joyous New Year 2013 to everyone! God bless us everyone! 🙂

    • That’s a beautiful word for your heart, MaryLou! May God crown your new year with His favor and joy and blessing… a year of walking in His favor! I have been thinking of the two things that made George know he was alive “again”… and joy and anticipation are two things that certainly do that! 🙂

  4. Pam-
    how i needed to read this particular post–a dear family who we have known for years suffered the worst blow possible- the wife taught so many wide-eyed children in kindergarten~~our son was among her many students. I saw her at church on Christmas Eve- she glowed with the sheer joy of being there with her two sisters– two days later, her husband left this world–by his own hand.

    i am struggling for answers-but only God and this man who was a husband, father, friend-but must have suffered great PAIN to reach such a horrible decision-will know the reason. i have prayed-asking God to please FORGIVE his actions, and to help this family- that is broken-shattered,
    and darkness surrounds them. Right now- there are no answers–only sorrow. i can’t attend
    the memorial service~~my own physical pain is speaking loud words that i must heed.
    But I can PRAY-knowing my words are heard.

    Blessings to you Pam as we begin this New Year.

    • I just awoke to someone on the radio teaching about heaven… how God has kept each one of our tears in a bottle, and the last one will be wiped away the moment we step in there. How no one will ever again say things like “have a good day,” because it will forever be the most wonderful “day.” How joy will go on and on and pain, even if recalled, will no longer be. The joy of that promise…that is what we must cling to. I will lift up you and your friends, that God will hold you all close in this shattering sorrow. Your heart and prayers for them are a candle of His light that He can take and magnify in ways we don’t know. And may He bring some grace out of ashes as only He knows how to do. We don’t know what led to this man’s despair, or what miracles God could do in his last moments… but God’s love never lets go. May that peace surround you all. Because you and I personally know what tragedy like this can bring, I think also how God can put hope and strength and healing in our pockets to carry us through even the unimaginable.

      Blessings on your new year, Martha… more than you can hold even as possibility in this moment.

  5. Emma says:

    Pam, I love this film – reminding us to be grateful, in every circumstance. I also love this:

    “Sometimes life becomes most precious, receives the clarity of a cleansing spring rain, when it brinks with death and loss.”

    Oh how I’ve known this in 2012. Praying that 2013 will bring spring rain on us all – good or bad – may we receive His blessing.

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