“How precious it is, Lord, to realize that You are thinking about me constantly.” (Psalm 139:17)
A psalm on melancholy and light
Blustery, fusty, windblown days of fall. Sometimes I love ‘em, with a knowing of shelter from the storm, Lord. Other times, I’m Eeyore and the only color my eyes, my heart, seem to register is…melancholy blue.
Rain drips and douses and bedraggles soggy brown leaves, sending them to crackle on the ground till I lose sight of shimmer coming round the corner. Gloom shimmies on its belly through my house in early day (when it should be bright!) – making me feel, well, ornery — while arrows with poisoned points slip through chinks in my armor, because, like Eve, I let them.
But you – oh you, my Beloved Lord – you know just when to send shafts of Heaven streaming through the clouds. You shine upon the backs of leafy arms till they appear as silver-tipped hanging bells of Heaven. You open my eyes to autumn confetti colors collecting like candied sugar sprinkles around the edges of lampposts, along the once drab curbs and somehow… soaring festive hope.
Then – just at a low moment when I’m questioning if I really have much to offer with my words…what is this blog accomplishing anyway…a completely unexpected email appears in my box.
And in an instant, you surprise me with how you are thinking of me — by letting me know that you are touching someone whose work I so admire, somehow, with mine... When I hadn’t even a clue she’d read anything here…
And it is ALL you, and for you… Wordsinger of our hearts…
I look at her smiling face on her blog, treasure the beauty she paints and wonder at how you connect your children… how we may think we are conjuring these things up by ourselves (like, ‘Hey, I think I’ll ask Pam if I can join her links! I’ll endorse her work!’) and all along it is YOU, using us to encourage and bolster and hearten even relative strangers, one to one.
Oh, the power of blessing you have put in our tongue!
I watch your fiery paintbrush moving from treetop to treetop, transforming green to gold and crimson and pumpkin orange. Rainbows dance on waters and you are there in all your majesty. And now I see how forgotten revelation becomes new as you remind me… you make their radiance glow even stronger in the blustery, fusty, windblown days of fall… With them, I lift my arms to my King with songs of thank you, thank you, thank you… abandoned as to light and frolic-y love songs…
“If your dilly, dilly heart
Feels a dilly, dilly way
And if you’ll answer, “Yes”
In a pretty little church
On a dilly, dilly day
I’ll be wed in a dilly, dilly dress of
Lavender blue, dilly, dilly
Then you’ll be king, dilly, dilly
And I’ll be your queen”
~ English Folk Song
© Pam Depoyan
To follow my 31-days posts throughout October, simply go to categories on the right of this blog and click on “Autumn Psalmbook“
Topic: Inspiration and Faith (My theme: Autumn Psalmbook)